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April 27, 2012#

Why I don’t own a Kindle (…yet)

Despite being a passionate lifelong book-reader, and working on a number of digital publishing projects professionally, I still don’t own a Kindle*. On paper (no pun intended) I should have been a massive early adopter and leading the charge, but something’s always held me back and I’ve never yet taken the time to properly articulate the reasons for my reluctance.

I want to want to own a Kindle. I want to want to buy loads of books for it. But deep down I don’t actually want to, at least not yet, and I think there are four main reasons why.

1) The best camera is the one that’s with you

I don’t have a Kindle for the same reason I don’t have a separate point-and-shoot digital camera anymore – I have multipurpose devices that fill that role for me. It’s why I spend a whole bunch of money each month to pay for an iPhone (lucky enough to have access to an iPad through work, but would definitely buy one if I didn’t). They’re general computing devices that do a lot of things well (or at least well enough), including e-reading. Indeed, I’ve burned through a whole bunch of public domain works on the free Stanza app (Edgar Rice Burroughs at the moment. Oh Tarzan, you’re such a product of your time).

2) My name is Trevor Klein, and I’m a book bully

“Yes just like the Escapist in Kavalier and Clay.”
“What’s that?”
“You haven’t read the The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay?! To the bookden!”

Conversations like this are why I’ve been called a book bully by colleagues and friends. Admittedly I can be a bit overzealous in lending books that I consider must-reads. And perhaps a bit too relentless in my vicarious need to recapture the magic I felt reading it for the first time (“How are you finding it?” “How far have you got?” “What do you mean you haven’t read anymore since yesterday, what have you been doing?!” “STOP WALKING AWAY FROM ME AND DISCUSS THIS BOOK.”).

Anyway! For me this ability to share is a really important part of the book buying process. When I buy a book it’s not just so I can re-read it, but because I think it’s important enough for me to want the potential to lend it to friends in the future. Sadly, I’ve yet to come across an elegant enough digital solution that’ll let me carry on doing this.

And, by the way, you should DEFINITELY read The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay.

3) To the bookden!

Too small to be a room, too big to be a cupboard, there’s a space in my flat that you can walk into and be surrounded by shelves. Shelves filled with hundreds of books (and some DVDs). I call it the bookden because I’m the kind of loser who names rooms and a few times each week I’ll wander in, spend a few minutes scanning the shelves, before picking a book to read (or re-read). It’s deeply, deeply satisfying.

Seeing things like Hodderscape’s Shelf of Glory (scroll down), and remembering I’m not alone in this Showing-off Slightly Obsessive Organising and Displaying and Browsing book behaviour is also, frankly, pretty satisfying.

It’ll be a hard thing to give up if there’s nothing to replace it.

4) Hardware and software and content, oh my!

I watch TV/films, listen to music, read books and play games. All of these are authored to some degree, and available in physical forms I can own and store in my home, whether that’s CDs, DVDs or hardbacks. Being a modern sort of person in the 21st century, I’m increasingly getting this authored entertainment through digital distribution channels. So, I don’t buy CDs anymore, I buy from iTunes; I don’t buy boxed games anymore, I buy apps.

Why don’t I do the same with books? 99.99% of my book purchases are still physical** (albeit usually over the web – hi Amazon!).

I think it comes down to a conceptual distinction between hardware, software and content.

In the case of music there’s some content (a song), a bit of hardware to play the song, and a bit of software to make sure the hardware knows what to do with the song. Sometimes the content itself is stored on a bit of hardware (like a CD) that needs to go into another bit of hardware (a CD player) because the CD player is bundled with the software that can interpret the content on the CD (make it loud enough to rock the house). On its own the CD isn’t much use, as it’s just content storage, without any interpretative software or hardware to play it.

An mp3 is fundamentally no different. It’s content, encoded in a memory efficient way, and needing a particular piece of software (iTunes, Winamp) to interpret it so that it can be played on a piece of hardware (PC, iPod, etc).

Printed books are different. They’re content (words and pictures), they’re hardware (bound pages) AND, crucially, they’re also software. The software is the bit that says this page comes before that page, but this page comes after. This sentence first, then that one. The printing process of typesetting and ordering a text is implicitly bundling the software that interprets the content in with the hardware.

And it’s a bally good bit of hardware. Very portable, great random access, durable, infinite battery life, no screen glare, high resolution, no software updates needed, no risk of obsolescence, and it’s attractive to look at. The books I’ve been given by my parents and grandparents work just as well now as they did 20, 30, 60 years ago. Out of approximately 1,000 books, I’ve only ever had one with a binding that fell apart on me (I’m looking at you, “Are you Dave Gorman?”). There’s not much other authored content you can point at that has the same amazing unity and quality of hardware, software and content (except perhaps board games). Printed books are special.

I just don’t have that same confidence in digital book files and e-readers yet. If I invest in an e-book collection, essentially duplicating my favourite books and then buying solely digitally from then on, can I be guaranteed the same longevity, reliability and quality of content, software and hardware?

I know that the whole industry is working on it, and this is in no way meant to be a slight on the incredible work that so many publishers, retailers and technology companies are doing. But, for me personally, looking at the current technology, at the fragmentation in software and hardware for what, in theory, should be the simplest bit of digital publishing – do what a printed book does at least as well as a printed book does it – I just don’t think we’re there yet. But I really, really want us to be!

It might be different for me if there was a consumer level technology that let me quickly and easily scan in my books for use in e-readers (someone please invent this with magic) in the same way as I can rip my CDs. But there isn’t.

Until then, I’ll raise a salute to the publishers, retailers and technologists who are doing there best to Sort It All Out, and to the growing army of e-readers who DO have a Kindle (or other e-reader) and are buying e-books. It’s clearly meeting your needs, even if it hasn’t quite met mine yet.

But it will. One day.

I hope.

 

* or any other kind of dedicated e-reader. 

** the 0.01% of books that I am buying digitally will be the subject of another blog, but in brief I’m buying them because they are genuinely digital books doing something that I consider valuable. Something that couldn’t be done in print.

April 9, 2012#

Word Up, series 2, episode 4

Word Up

Fellow Somethin’ Elser Nicky Birch recently invited me onto her monthly arts podcast, Word Up, as a voice of digital-stuff and token boy.

Described as “like Loose Women, only we might talk about hip hop, or hair metal, or House Party the movie…so not really like Loose Women at all”, its brilliant and even though I’m not really the target audience I enjoy listening to it a lot.

Episode 4 of series 2 is now out in the wild, wherein Nicky, Bernadette and I chat about Alabama Shakes, Marley (not the Jennifer Aniston dog film, the other one) and the best TV series you may have missed but can still catch up in full for free.

Word Up, S02E04, or get them ALL on iTunes

December 20, 2011#

Develop’s 30 under 30

I’ve wanted to make computer games since I was titchy, so being chosen as one of Develop magazine’s 30 under 30 for the coming year is a Big Deal.  I feel very fortunate that I get to make games as a job.

So cheers Develop, and SE; you’ve made 7-year-old-me super mega happy. (Adult me is pretty chuffed, too.)

Big congrats to everyone else on the list – a ruddy talented bunch: Develop’s 30 under 30, 2012

November 23, 2011#
Mario, square on
Mario, close up
Mario, from another angle
Mario, at an angle
MJ pixel
Big pixel

Decided to do something a bit more permanent after the last round of pixel mosaic-ing, so Super Mario 3 (modelling the vair fashionable raccoon suit) has ended up on canvas.

Quite pleased with how he turned out, although I did get sent this link to PETA’s rather horrible MARIO WEARS FUR SO IT MAKES WEARING FUR OK game, so along with the pride there is now the Guilt.

I also had a few requests: @hemmysphere wanted a portrait, @dogwinters wanted Michael Jackson, and @wesayso was after a big pixel (with instructions).

THEIR WISH WAS MY COMMAND.

Killing two mosaic-birds with one mosaic-stone, the portrait of thriller-era MJ came out ok, apart from looking a bit jaundiced.

Spent hours doing that flipping big pixel, though.

October 25, 2011#
Pixel mosaic Sonic and pixel mosaic one-up mushroom
Full view of pixel mosaic Sonic
Close up of pixel mosaic Sonic
Close up pixel mosaic one-up extra life mushroom

I finally found a fun use for the mosaic tiles I impulse-bought a few years ago – pixel art!

Definitely going to do some more – feel free to make requests. I might start sticking them to canvas frames so they’re a bit more display-able. The slightly palette-swapped Sonic (yellow!!) was just laid out on our coffee table, so I had to dismantle him, but ‘Get A Life’ is stuck to some card with glue dots. Given a sturdier backing underneath I’m pretty confident he’ll hold up to a new life as an ORNAMENT.

Victory chiptune beeping noise.

 

August 31, 2011#

Broadcast Hot Shot 2011

Very pleased to be chosen as one of Broadcast Magazine’s Hot Shots in the ‘Digital’ category for 2011. Thanks Broadcast Magazine! Thanks my boss for nominating me!

revor Klein Digital Hot Shot 2011

You can read the whole supplement here. Big congrats to everyone who was featured.

May 24, 2011#

Duncan the Allergic

Hurrah! My favourite wizard (Duncan the Allergic) has been featured in Wizard Week 2011 on People I Know. LOOK. Thanks, Timothy Winchester!

LOOK AGAIN. Duncan is the kind of wizard I wish existed in my books when I was a child. I also like a lot of the other wizards in wizarding week, especially Dan’s Merlin.

Finally, you should read People I Know if you don’t already, as it’s very funny.

May 23, 2011#

Off The Wall Post, episode 6

Last Monday I had the incredible, unprecedented and rather special honour to be the first ever guest on the Off The Wall Post podcast. Presented by my pals Baz, Kat and Dan the recording was a lot more anarchic than I’d expected from listening to the polished brilliance of past episodes.

After several hours of recording, laughing and talking a lot about our mums, I didn’t envy Dan the task of editing it down to 45 minutes. Somehow he managed it (the mums bit got cut, though) and it’s turned out very, very funny.

We chatted about apps, memes, twitters and bus maps, and at the very end reveal insulting nicknames from our childhoods (ooh). They are lovely for letting me come and play. Thanks guys!

Listen to it here: Binaural curious… ?, then subscribe and listen to them ALL.

March 28, 2011#

DARES, starring ORNAMENTAL COWS

A 30 second film I made last weekend. It’s the re-enactment of a childhood conversation about DARES as performed by two ornamental cows. You should definitely watch it.

Go on.

I dare you.

March 7, 2011#

P-p-pick my penguin joke, please. No? OK.

In November last year I decided to enter the get-your-joke-on-the-back-of-a-Penguin competition. After a good few hours brainstorming, I eventually settled on these two:

Q: Why did the penguin go on a seafood diet?
A: To get fin

Q: Why do penguins always look like they’re wearing tuxedos?
A: Because dinner’s always a-fish-shoal.

A few days ago I got THIS email:

The funniest jokes of the year!
You entered the McVitie’s Penguin jokes competition and told us your best penguin joke. We were sent so many hilarious jokes that we have decided to reward some of the best ones with a prize. You’ll be pleased to know that we thought your joke was so funny we would like to award you with your very own WWF Penguin Adoption Pack!

So I didn’t get my joke on a biscuit (boo), but I did get a lovely stuffed penguin (yay). It arrived today, and I’ve already thought of a name.

Mighty penguin of victory

Pengwin.

January 1, 2011#

December – 12 months of pundays

Happy New Year! 

Some people are doctors, farmers, human rights activists, etc - contributing usefully to the sum of human knowledge and existence in thousands of ways.  Instead, I wrote a pun every day in 2010, and here’s #punliners 334 to 365:

1st – 31st December

“I wish I could draw a set of four aces… wow thanks!” – Djinn Rummy

Apparently eating a load of condiments before battle makes soldiers braver. Hence the expression, “he mustard up his courage”.

Got fired from making appetisers that walk straight into your mouth. They’ve given me my marching hors d’œuvres.

Q: If you have two chickens, and I take one chicken away, what do you have? A: A poultry sum.

I test the Queen’s food for poison in exchange for exemption from tax. It’s dangerous, but there’s no accounting for taste.

I’m a vintage red, she’s a sparkling white – can we ever be together?! I guess the corks of true love never did run smooth…

One moment – I just need to find someone to look after my pet panda. Bear with me.

At first I thought he was wearing a pheasant-shaped shoe, but it’s actually part of his body! Watson, the game’s afoot!

Disapproving elephants. Tusk tusk tusk.

Just heard a long speech about endangered mammals. It did tapir off a bit at the end.

Remember when they offered to let us go camping on their field again and we said no? They’re really having re-tent shun issues.

Lions eat things roar.

Do your bit for the environment – leave your wine bottles outside, sit back and let nature take its corks.

Never judge a calculator by its casing – it’s what’s on the inside that counts.

Ever used a putter on a sheet of silica glass? Nothing compares to a quality golf quartz.

I had severe back pain until an Egyptian farmer ran me over. If you’re also suffering, I can recommend a good Cairo tractor.

PRINCES: when you suddenly become King, don’t worry – it’s normal to feel a bit throne.

My skin tone is a very vivid sort of reddish-orange. My mum says I’m one in vermilion.

Can’t think of a way to describe people who, after some thought, talk rubbish. Give me a minute, it’s on the tip of my tongue.

“Just got bitten by an insect.” “Flea?” “No use running, it’s already happened.”

“Captain! Land ho!” “Shore?!” “Pretty positive…”

I ate a binary pony and now my throat’s feeling a bit horse.

As I leaned in to kiss my date she dropped a block of dense, soft metal on my foot. I think I was being lead on.

My ambition to create a softer tartan for Scottish clans sometimes seems futile. Ah well, no use sighing over kilt silk.

I refuse to modernise my music collection, and that’s vinyl.

My party trick is singing a pop song while lifting a heavy bit of wooden furniture – carry-oaky.

“Wotcha Zeus!” – ancient greets

HIP HOP FANS: Want to separate out the sample from the rest of a track? You need a centrifugee.

Tadpoles find TV absolutely ribbeting. It can seem like they have an idea what’s going on, but really they haven’t the froggiest.

Scottish girls on the pull are always tartan about.

I’ve got a dangerous addiction to writing puns. When I think of one, I gag. (It’s beyond a choke)

Pun. Done.

December 9, 2010#

Alex Mills interview and performance

My presenter friend Aiss asked me to film another interview for her blog, this time with singer/songwriter Alex Mills, who is really rather good.

See also: Ed Sheeran

December 1, 2010#

Remember, remember the puns of November

334 down, only 31 to go. Presenting November’s #punliners, with very little gunpowder, treason or plot:

1st – 30th November

With only my chauffeur for company I went on a quest to meet Suggs. I failed and at times was almost driven to Madness.

“Mr. Pimp, sir, is it true that you have the quickest girl in the business?” “Well, I hate to slow my own strumpet…”

When rowing, try using a flexible paddle bent into a bow. It might give you some extra speed. Oar knot.

Retraining as a tree surgeon? Your days are lumbered.

“Along with a bomb plot, in 1605 someone also tried to assassinate MPs by stabbing them with cutlery.” “Fawkes?” “Knives, too!”

I’ve seen a lot in my time as a professional dancer, often while spinning on the spot. I’m a man of the whirled.

Cheer up Thor, you’ve got a face like thunder.

My campaign to stop dogs showing their happiness was ignored until I got some press. Now everyone’s jumped on the banned-wagging.

My scarecrow has decided to go on a crash diet. It really is the last straw.

Gilet: the vest a man can get

Chris Hoy gave me a lift in his car made from Olympic gold and flowers. I was running late so he put the petal to the medal.

When two fans of classic computer games need to discuss an important issue it’s known as a tête-à-têtris.

Jewish ski professionals wish each other Shabbat Slalom

“To sculpt chocolate you need special tools and a simple idea.” “An aeroplane?” “Yes, plus a Yorkie hammer and a Kit Kat lathe.”

I saw someone drive a Bravo off a cliff and survive (the car still worked, too). A real death-defying Fiat.

“Cruella! Why, when I wanted a lemonade, did you insist on me getting a liqueur?” “De Vil’s advocaat, of course!”

Koan the Barbarian

My mate got high off a roast chicken. He free-baste the juice.

I think volcanoes are misunderstood – they’re lavas, not fighters.

Penguins look like they’re in tuxedos because dinner is always a fish shoal.

When sheep need a transplant they get a doner kebab.

While scuba diving I heard some polyps singing about informing, educating & entertaining – a beautiful example of a choral Reith.

Apparently rabbit costumes and painted eggs are on trend now?? I can’t keep up with you fashioneasters.

Don’t you hate those lawyers who hustle for business around fancy restaurants and dimly lit jazz clubs? Bloody ambience chasers.

My mate’s decided he wants to start shipping eagles, falcons and hawks between Dover and Calais – yet another aerie-ferry scheme.

Giant Peaches, as with all fruit-based homes, come with problems. For James, it was the radiators not being plummed in.

After a hard day of organised crime Japanese mobsters like to unwind with a dip in the yakuzi.

Why do tile games do sit-ups? To work on their abdominoes.

This Russian B&B is very good at putin clean bed lenin on. Full marx from me!

However much you may want to, you must never hit someone with a Stradivarius – violins is never the answer.

November 11, 2010#

Five awesome typewriter things

Ahh, manual typewriters. So frustrating and yet so sort-of-satisfying. When I was 9 my school taught me how to touch type on one and I whiled away many a rage-filled hour hammering with tiny fingers at unyielding keys, mentally chanting the dirge of the trainee-typist: “A. Ess. Dee. Eff. Space. Jay. Kay. Ell. Semi colon. Space. A. Ess. Dee. Eff…” etc, etc, repeat until your fingers bleed.

That said, by the time I was 10 I was making basically no typing mistakes – a sort of Pavlovian conditioning where I knew every mistake meant a) getting the Tipp-ex out and b) more typing, so better GET IT RIGHT FIRST TIME.

When I used my first computer keyboard, my typing almost immediately became lazy and imprecise, my fingers gliding with improbable ease. Mistakes were easy to correct, so I made more (I even made one just then – mae instead of made). So yes, bittersweet.

It had been a LOT of years since I last saw a manual typewriter, but recently I’ve been coming across a lot of really interesting uses, hacks and modifications.

Here are my top five, in order of you’ve-probably-seen-this-already to get-ready-to-have-your-mind-blown:

5) Datamancer

Upcycling old typewriter components (and more) to create beautiful Steampunk keyboards.

He also makes whole computers and monitors and other incredible gubbins, but the keyboards are my fave. (Are you listening, friends? Chanukah’s coming up.  Just sayin’.)

They combine what I love about manual typewriters – the tactile feel and aesthetics, with the harsh reality that I sadly can’t use one to write a blog, go online, or kill zombies. With this, I could!

4) usbtypewriter.com

An iPad dock/usb keyboard combo.  Anachronistc? More like amacchronistic, right guys?! Yeah. Wordplay.

For those keeping track of my wishlist, you’ll need to get me an iPad first, so I’ve got something to plug into the usbtypewriter. Thanks.

3) Haunted Typewriter

A misanthropic possessed typewriter that comes to life as you approach it? OK!

It was made as part of the recent Unleashed Devices exhibition which I wish I’d been able to visit. There’s something rather creepy about seeing a typewriter move of its own accord.

Fingers crossed it’ll get a permanent home somewhere or, at the very least, there’ll be another chance to see it in the flesh (in the metal?).

More on the haunted typewriter here.

(Disclosure: Neil‘s my cousin)

2) You’re in a room. There’s a typewriter.

Following on nicely, Jonathan Guberman has also made a typewriter that can type by itself. What’s even more interesting is that you can also type messages the other way.  It’s an output AND an input device.

And what’s more he’s rigged it to play classic text adventure/interactive fiction game Zork.

Can’t wait to see more of this – I know he’s working on some games written especially for the platform of talky-typewriter.  I’d love to see a real life / interactive fiction crossover game.

You’re in a room with me, a possessed typewriter. There are no exits, but I’ll respond to your questions.

>>>Why am I here?

That’s a big question, why not look around the room.  Can you see anything?

>>>Painting.

Where is the painting?

>>>On the wall.

Ahh! That’s a print of the Mona Lisa.  Notice anything strange?

>>>No.

Lift it off the wall.  Anything happen?

>>>A key dropped out.

Interesting!

Something like that, only less rubbish. You get the idea.

(originally came across this at Boing Boing)

1) Keira Rathbone

Kiera Rathbone is a little bit (read: a lot) mind-blowing.  I’ll let her explain:

“I create drawings using my vintage typewriter as my pen. I use letters, numbers and symbols to build up a picture rather than words.”

This is her drawing (typing) Bournemouth pier:

So yeah – creative, incredible, clever.  I was particularly impressed by her Obama.

(tip off from my mate Sarah Jane)

Carriage return

So, admittedly, this has mostly turned into a glorified Amazon wishlist for Things I Want. Sorry.

Anyone else got a good typewriter story (possibly involving the horrors of ribbon ink)? Or come across something I should have included and didn’t? Let me know in the comments!

And remember: it’s typewriter, not typewronger. Yeah. More wordplay.

November 4, 2010#

‘Murder in the Nth Degree’ – Avenge Vulture Attack music video

Back in October I helped out on the filming of this music vid for Avenge Vulture Attack, directed by Sam Shepherd and shot by Dave White. It turned out great!

Plus the band are all lovely, lovely people so you should go and buy their single. OK? OK.

If you’re thinking that the way the lights were turned on and off was PARTICULARLY impressive, you’d be right. And, yes, that was all me.

I don’t like to brag but I sure flick a mean switch.

Fun facts:

  • Next door to where we filmed was an exhibition of all white paintings on white walls. Really.
  • Opposite was an enthusiastic theatrical rehearsal where everyone had one arm tied behind their back.
  • People wearing thin scarves and aloof expressions kept floating in throughout the day saying, “Is this the audition?”
  • When filming a close-up of the lights, Dave managed to melt a little bit of his (very expensive) lens. It still works, but now has a battle scar, and we all learnt a very important lesson about big lights being big hot.

All in all, a very fun day in a very fun place. Thanks Sheps!